Table Manners, a Pagan Ritual

As we draw closer to Christmas I once again find my Facebook wall flooded with Christians commentating on Christmas as a pagan holiday. Once again I find myself debating the same old nonsense about this and that…

Here’s what’s different this year. I have a new spin on the argument. A fact based satire on Table Manners.

Table Manners are not once mentioned in the bible anywhere. Yet things like talking with your mouth full, or speaking over each other are the standard doctrine of etiquette.
Noticeably this cultural etiquette is limited only to Europe, and where did they come from?

Italy 1550s, that’s where.

That’s 1500 years after Christ mind you.

Before this people would pick lice out of their hair while stuffing their faces with their hands, not even washing their hands, while farting and talking away with their mouth full. They would pick their nose, burp, fart or whatever impulse they felt they needed to do – right there in formal dining situations, rich or poor it did not matter… it was so grotesque Giovanni della Casa advised in ” Galateo,” his 1558 book on manners:

One should not comb his hair nor wash his hands in public… The exception to this is the washing of the hands when done before sitting down to dinner, for then it should be done in full sight of others, even if you do not need to wash them at all, so that whoever dips into the same bowl as you will be certain of your cleanliness“.

The situation was so horrid Giovanni felt compelled to sit down and write an entire book on what people did that grossed him out and what people ought to do differently. The book itself was picked up by nobility, the clergy, kings and peasants alike, and thus the concept of etiquette was born.

Guess what else.. Giovanni della Casa was catholic, and he was the worst kind of Catholic- A Jesuit Inquisitor.

His job, and only pleasure in life, was to hunt down and kill protestant heretics in service of the Babylonian Mother church. Yet he is considered one of the primary founders of basic modern western etiquette. Sick isn’t it, yet he claimed it was none other then the Virgin Mary herself who inspired his book that swept through Europe faster then the Black Death Plague.

So if catholics are nothing more then pagan savages and they invented table manners- I suppose we need to tell our kids it’s ok to do whatever they want at dinner.

Go Ahead, Take a dump right on the dinning room chair little Jimmy if that’s what you feel you need to do because we do not want Paganism in our homes!

Yet that would be uncivilized wouldn’t it. However people, christian people, did this sort of thing for many centuries. So if you would like to talk to me about about why I shouldn’t celebrate Christmas, then explain to me why it’s rude for me to burb in your face with my mouth full of cheeze itz.

Though I am a christian gentleman and of course I would never do that, even though the bible doesn’t tell me so. Even though I sorta feel like it.

So for those who are trying to get out of Christmas on religious grounds, I’m convinced you side more with atheist trying to sterilize everything religious. The propaganda of Christmas being a pagan holiday itself in origin an attack from atheists, and here you are sharing that view. In the end so what if it’s a catholic invention, 98%of what everyone in the western world do everyday is a catholic invention, it does not make it evil. My point of this is, if all your looking for is evil in this world, your sure to find it in everything. How can you claim to be a light in this world when all you want to do is shed darkness?

If I were to write about Christmas again then I’m just going to repeat more or less what I’ve said about Christmas last year. I wrote it in an article just for the sake of not having to repeat myself in what is just a simplified list, though not necessarily my best work. You can read about it in the below link. God bless and Merry Christmas.

The Christian Christmas Dilemma and my 2 cents


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